Hope

Hope is a good thing for anyone to have. I think writers need an especially good dollop of the stuff.

I’m an adequately confident person, by which I mean I believe I’m a good writer, but I also know I can always improve my craft and/or a particular story. In other words, I think I’m pretty good at distinguishing between bad advice and a bad story. I’m also an “up” sort of gal, practicing being happy with a vengeance, as I firmly believe the concept of happiness is a verb, not a noun.

So I’m mostly positive in general and about my writing career. Do I get down? Ever react in a silly, illogical way? Have disgusting pity parties with my stuffed lion? Yeah. I do. It’s embarrassing. But I’m writing about a recent melt down because even though I'm confident, happy, and have had success, I don’t always practice what I preach. ALL writers, I’m convinced, have their black moments. It’s a hard business.

So. After publishing with small to medium publishers I’m now trying to 1), sell to a big publisher and 2), get an agent. I sent my newest book, Chimera, to a big publisher who actually accepts non-agented stuff (few do). Usually it takes four to six months to receive a form letter rejection…I know this because I’ve submitted other manuscripts. You can guess where I’m going. After three short weeks I get the no go.

I was really sad. I decided that this publisher had my name in big bold letters posted in the mailroom: ATTENTION! ANY BOOK BY KELLY MADDEN SEND BACK! And perhaps in a smaller script: but if you want a good laugh read, then shred. (Here’s where that writer’s overdrive imagination does us no good.) My husband, bless him, didn’t make fun, but calmly stated that perhaps someone IS looking out for my stuff and reading it right away (knowing it would be good) in the hopes it would fit with this year’s portfolio.

I would have none of that. I moped all evening. Then right before I went to bed I checked my email. And lo, an agent from a well-respected agency wanted to read Chimera. I know that this agent looks at many manuscripts and so this is certainly no guarantee of representation. But being asked means someone who knows about writing and the industry picked MY manuscript out of the hundreds of partials she receives every month was…hope inspiring.

I don’t know if she will like the completed book, think she can sell it, or if we will “click”. But being asked was an honor. And the request came at a point when I really needed it. Divine intervention? I don’t know. But I never have believed in coincidences.

At any rate, I’m using the fresh infusion of hope to start my new book. Zero to sixty in five, four, three, two, one…